As a leaf blows into the wind, a bud is beginning to form.
“When you lose a second parent you essentially become an orphan,” a friend told me after my mother passed last month. Interesting thought that I’ve been contemplating…. I never considered myself to be an orphan when she passed, although I understand the statement. I did however feel the loss and the loneliness of not having her here on this Earth. It’s interesting that although she lived nearly on the other side of the country, knowing that she was there and happily enjoying the sunshine, warmth and mountains of her favorite state was a comfort to me. I knew she was happy and was where she wanted and needed to be.
In deep gratitude, I have experienced such an enormous amount of love that I haven’t felt like I was alone or on my own. I am reminded that I although my parents and grandparents are no longer on this earth, I have an enormous family, a family full of biology and friendships. We all have this family. We are all connected as one family. We can hold each other up, listen with deep attention, feel with compassion, forgive without apology, and love unconditionally. As I experience loss – deep, heart-wrenching, incapacitating heartache, I also feel the love of my family – those members close and far, biological or not, new or old.
My family is changing, and although I’ve lost, I have gained a family that is ever-expanding.
I like your perspective on grief and loss. Always look for the beauty. xo
Thank you, Lynda.
Jodi,
I am so very sorry to learn of your mom’s death. This was beautifully written and served as a reminder to me. When my mom died 9 years ago,9 years after my dad had died,I remember thinking that I was an orphan. Part of that was due to the fact that my mom had lost her zest for life and had emotionally withdrawn several years before her death.But as time passed,I also realized that I am part of a large and loving group of family and friends within which I am intricately connected ,supported,and loved.The realization which brings me up short these days is the fact that I am the so called matriarch of this clan-it is a vaguely unsettling feeling. I often feel like an imposter,not mature enough to be this woman of 68 years.I still occasionally need to ask my parents about a memory or have a question about their connections to their pasts. It is then that I most feel their loss and feel adrift. And then I look inward and celebrate with joy the woman I continue to become and the connected life I have been gifted with.Again,I thank you for nudging me to remember and reflect.
Thank you, Kathy!
Kathy,
Your reflection touched my heart and I can easily see you as a matriarch of your clan!! You have such a wonderfully beautiful and energetic presence that is so influential. Your clan is so blessed to have you and I know you have all the tools you need to be all that you are. I wish you the very, very best, as always.
Thank you Jodi💜
Beautiful and heartfelt. 💝
Dear Jodi,
Beautiful and heartfelt. Tears of joy and sadness create an interesting inner peace.
I feel your love and your loss and I am happy for you that you have found balance in your new identity. I think you are correct though, children who were raised in a loving family whose parents are gone are not orphaned because there was the opportunity of love and time spent creating moments and memories.
I am sad to learn of your mother’s passing, as we had spoken of your mission to find her, and I hope that you had the opportunity to spend time with her as you had desired to. I will reflect upon your words as I go through my day today as they foreshadow my future. I have been here with my parents for the past few days, weeding and helping out with honey do projects, enjoying these last few days of summer. As I am sitting here drinking a cup of coffee this morning , your words hit home in a heartfelt way. I will carry them with me and reflect upon them as I wander through my day…
Much love to you.
Barb
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Love to you, Barb. Your words are spot on and I can feel your compassion and deep-feeling heart!! Thank you for your never-ending love and support!
Agreed. I lost my Dad in February but realize I have grown such a supportive network of friends and family it somehow helps ease the pain and reassures me that I will never be alone. I’m sorry for your loss Jodi. You really resemble your Mom!
That is such a silver lining, isn’t it?
Beautifully written from the heart. Glad you found peace.
Love,
Lisa
Thank you for your kindness.
Thank you!!